Christians often sing praises to God, give thanks to him, and show our gratitude by serving him. But we rarely say “I love you” to God as we would to a person we love. Why? Is it because deep down in our hearts God is a powerful yet distant being, whom we have been told is our “refuge, rock, fortress, strength”, a loving Father who can bless us and protect us but not someone we can relate to emotionally or love back? That was how God was in my life for a long time until recent years. 

I remember reading Psalm 18 one morning and noticed for the first time that it starts with “I love you, LORD”. Suddenly, I felt this tenderness in my heart and said “I love you” back to God. Since then, God has slowly changed from being this powerful God to a Person whom I can love back. Reading the Bible, especially the book of Psalms, doesn’t feel the same anymore, sometimes I would hear the gentle and patient voice of a Father calling me back from my stubborn ways, oftentimes I would feel his intense and unrelenting love towards me, a rebellious child, and tears would stream down my face. Other times I sense his delight whenever I spend time talking to him, and most times I simply feel his firm grip on me, making sure I know he loves me and I am eternally secure. Romans 5:8 tells us, “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” 1 John 4:19 also reminds us, “We love because God first loved us.” 

Being able to feel God’s love and wanting to love him back is actually a breakthrough in my spiritual journey yet this responsive love did not grow on its own – it is because I am the object of his covenantal and electing love in Jesus Christ. Looking back, I remember trying hard to obey his law out of fear of punishment in the beginning, to growing my knowledge of him and no longer questioning his plans for me even in hardship, to finally feeling his love in a personal way. It took me nearly 30 years but what a joy to be able to connect with my Father finally. No longer is he this stern God but a personal one who holds my hand and takes me in his arms when I am afraid.

But how can I love him back? John 14:21 says, “Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me.” Similarly, 1 Samuel 15:22 also says, “Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams.” Clearly, God delights in our obedience more than anything. Not grieving God with our disobedience but trusting him and believing in his goodness no matter how difficult life becomes is the best way to love him. Spending time with him (and on his words), as we would with good friends would be another way to show our love, as we know our God takes great pleasure in a personal, intimate Father-child relationship with each of his children.

So, the question “Do you love me?” can be a starting place for each one of us to ask ourselves if I have been keeping his commands, prioritizing him, sharing my life with him, and cherishing his presence, his love, and his friendship.